5 Ways To Be More Confident
Susan Sarandon tells us what makes her confident — other than being wildly talented and gorgeous, of course.
Susan Sarandon is the epitome of self-confidence. At 69, the actress and L'Oreal Paris' muse quite literally proves that beauty has no age. Her motto? "A new morning, a new day. You have to live, not just exist."
She's brimming with self-confidence but that doesn't mean her life has been perfect. Talking about her own past, the Oscar winner said: "I know that if I fail, I'm strong enough to get up and start again. In my life I collapsed more than once, but I'm still here. I feel happy. Happy to get up every day as a mother, grandmother and committed woman. I try to say yes more than I say 'no'. I make my own choices and I try to live a full life."
Susan's secret is to stay positive, which is an attitude which is well worth embracing in order to build self-confidence. Her advice to women? "You must say yes to life and don't be afraid to take some risks. Be open to new opportunities, they help you to grow, and they're exciting. Faced with something that impresses you, either in your work or in your personal life, you have to invest in something you believe in and that you are passionate about."
We're all striving to be the best, most confident versions of ourselves — and here's a few more tips to keep working on that.
Why self-confidence is so important
Those who lack self-confidence constantly devalue themselves and often don't realize that others may find their qualities appealing. Their lack of confidence prevents them from taking initiative and moving forward as they simply don't believe that anything will come out of it. Of course this lack of self-confidence means missing out on major opportunities.
In other cases insecure people are known to play a role, meaning they pretend to feel comfortable with themselves and build up an imaginary version of themselves that simply isn't authentic. These people also have difficulty finding themselves and finding what suits the real them. That's why confidence is so essential - it's all about being happy, thinking independently, and acting freely, then eventually making relationships with people who you genuinely connect with. That leads to living a life that's true to who you are at your core.
How to enhance your self-confidence
To gain confidence, the first thing is to never lose sight of your true identity. That is to say, we must have a clear idea of who we really are: our passions, our characters, our feelings, our tastes. Then, we should try to highlight our strengths, our know-how, our organizational capacity, our friendships, even our talents. Feel free to write your qualities down if it helps!
Since a lack of confidence commonly comes from negative words or experiences during our childhoods or adolescence, it is essential to reclaim your confidence.
The 5 key ways to grow your self-confidence
1. Be true to yourself
We must give ourselves the right to have our own thoughts and opinions. You should never be discouraged from speaking your mind about something you're passionate about. You should express yourself in whichever way you want on a daily basis, even if it goes against what other people think. Start with your family first and when you're more comfortable, try expressing yourself to your friends and colleagues. It'll feel so much better than playing down or shrugging off your thoughts and ideas just because it's easier or makes you more popular.
2. Be assertive
Be genuine in your relationships, and don't try to distort reality in order to please others. You can't simply express yourself through your friends' ideas of what is right or wrong, you have to have your own strong sense of self. For example: buy clothes that you actually like instead of just copying your bestie's outfit! Dare to tell your partner that you don't want to go to that movie. Start small, then work up to bigger moves. Decide what you want, and go for it!
3. Set goals
Setting yourself mini challenges every day broadens your abilities and acquaints you with your limitations. Make your goals simple and achievable to begin with, then begin to try new things that might be a little out of your comfort zone. If you can't do something, this'll give you the opportunity to asses what went wrong and try again.
4. Repeat positive phrases morning and evening
It never hurts to give yourself a verbal confidence boost, and actually saying positive things out loud can make all the difference to your mindset. Saying: "I can do it", "I have the skills to do this job" or "I'm the best" might feel a little silly but it all contributes to positive thinking and building up that essential self-confidence. Believe you can and you will.
5. Face tricky situations head on
Instead of avoiding situations that make you uncomfortable, you must learn to confront them and move on. Nothing's worse than unfinished business, especially if it leaves you unhappy, and so during tough conversations it is important to maintain eye contact as keep the discussion going if you aren't quite satisfied with the outcome. Doing this will help you deal with stressful situations, which is an excellent quality to have in a tricky situation. And when it's all over, you'll feel more confident for working through the issue to get to a resolution you're happy with.