Everything You Need to Know About the Girls of Betches

This is what happens when you talk to Jordana Abraham and Aleen Kuperman about everything from their soon-to-be published second book, upcoming emoji keyboard, and how they became the Head Betches in Charge.

Instagram.com/betchesclique

When you think of the word “Betches,” what’s the first thing that comes to mind? Is it three college girls coming up with a snarky online platform for their take on the Internet world that reads as both offensive and hilarious, depending on how seriously you take it? (Our answer to this: Don’t. Take it too seriously, that is.)

Is it what has since the moment of its inception been a decidedly non-PC and refreshingly ironic, pointed point of view on everything we’re all thinking but most of us don’t have the guts to say? (So, instead, we just tag our friends on their posts on Instagram. You know you’ve done it.)

And if it’s not what immediately comes to mind, then it should be.  Because when their infamous list of ultimate collegiate maxims, The Betch List, initially took online media by storm right from Jordana Abraham and Aleen Kuperman’s college dorm, it was kind of a big deal.

Still, who better to ask, then, than those two, whose website Betches Love This (now just Betches) went viral over the course of several weeks in 2011? Remember: The Internet was a whole different beast way back then.

But fine. You can sit with them, if only because they let me do the very same after their panel at Create & Cultivate Dallas, a stylistically stunning conference dedicated to informing and entertaining female entrepreneurs in the digital space.

Anyway, this is what happens when you rapid-fire question Betches' Jordana Abraham and Aleen Kuperman with a series of rather inane and random questions – anywhere from how to know when you’ve lurked too deep on Instagram (we’ve all been there, knee-deep in the waters of 62 whole weeks ago), to how they took their rightful positions as Head Betches in Charge.

Jordana Abraham, Aleen Kuperman, and Samantha Fishbein  
Jordana Abraham, Aleen Kuperman, and Samantha Fishbein  
Erin Baiano for The New York Times

   

Advice you have for aspiring female entrepreneurs? The #1 thing you would want to share?

AK: Stay confident. Don’t let people bring you down, because a lot of women are kind of timid at first [especially] when you’re starting a new job or starting your own thing. When you’re starting something that you’re passionate about, stay passionate. Stay true to that, I think for sure.

Jordana Abraham: Yeah, I spoke to a female entrepreneur once who told me that.

Aleen Kuperman: This one time.

JA: No, like I was interviewing her, and she told me that men are more likely to apply for jobs that they’re unqualified for, and then sort of just figure it out. Women are more likely to be like, “Oh, I’m not qualified.”

Livingly: Right, like talk themselves down.

JA: Exactly. I think just believing that you can figure something out, that you can do it. Not feeling like you need someone else to help you get there; you can do it on your own.

That’s a big step, because it’s so easy to do. Like, you’re gonna get doubt from other people…

AK: Why do it to yourself?

Any setbacks you had to overcome?

JA: Figuring out how to get into business mode.

AK: This was never supposed to be a business when we started, [because] none of us had business backgrounds.

JA: Specialization was definitely one of the best things that we figured out. Everyone [needs] to figure out what that thing they do best is, instead of everyone trying to do everything. So I think specialization was when we really started to see [a difference].

Getting over that hump to figure it out.

AK: Understanding what we’re good at.

JA: ...and focusing on that.

Well, and that’s when you really started growing, right? I mean, being able to build that community.

JA: Definitely. The more control you have over a specific part of the business as your own self, the more you feel responsible for it. If it does well, you feel more pride; and then if you’re sharing that responsibility with other people, you feel more pressure to make it the best that it can be. You take ownership of it.

Coolest moment of your career(s) thus far?

JA: Right now!

AK: In the last year and a half, we’ve been growing really quickly, and so each moment gets progressively better and more fun, and I feel like we how are we even here right now?

JA: We have that a lot.

AK: We were in the cab, in an Uber on the way here, and we were just like, “I can’t believe we walked our middle school halls together, [and now]...”

JA: Yeah, we go way back.

AK: Every moment just gets better.

JA: It’s really cool to be able to experience that with someone you’ve been friends with for so long. Meeting cool people who are doing really amazing things here [at Create & Cultivate].

Is there one standout moment that comes to mind?

JA: I think the Golden Globes. We were sent by E! to do the Golden Globes, and it was just cool to be there and having people watch you do what you do.

AK: There were people sitting behind us, and we were just like making jokes and putting them on Instagram for them. It was just kind of surreal. And so fun. We were just being ourselves.

Betchiest thing you’ve ever done?

JA: That’s a good question.

AK: This moment right now, we keep talking about ourselves.

Well, I’m interviewing you! [laughing]

(Editor’s note: It’s safe to say these two are not as betchy as the Internet wants you to think. Like, at all. Despite any flak they may have received in the past, their particular brand of sardonic humor is at heart meant to satirize the parts of our society the Internet has put on intense and spotlighted display. But singularly, as girls, they come across as the best friends – best betches – you always wanted.)

How do you know when you’ve lurked too deep on Instagram or Facebook?

AK: When you’re looking at somebody and have absolutely NO idea whose pictures they are. You’re like, “What am I looking at?” And then you find out it’s somebody’s cousin’s best friend’s…

Yeah, like you know them SOMEHOW.

JA: When you’re too far back. When you’re at like 100 weeks ago, and you’re like, “I need to find a different hobby.”

I need to stop scrolling.

JA: When I have time to get this far back, I need to change what I’m doing, because I’m clearly not being productive enough, to be this far back…

Why am I doing this? It’s time to be a real human being.

How to tell if your bestie is too drunk at the bar? Warning signs?

[both laughing]

JA: I would say if she’s being overly emotional; so that’s either happy or sad. If she’s crying or she’s telling you you guys will be best friends forever. If she’s doing something that is bad for her, like about to text someone who’s bad for her.

AK: Yes.

That’s a good one.

JA: Or if she’s like, about to fall, or is already falling a lot…

AK: Has fallen.

Has fallen once and is trying to skate over it, just pretend it didn’t happen.

JA: But if you notice too many of these things, it means you have not been drinking enough.

AK: Then you’re like going full Intervention.

JA: If you’re like, counting the person’s drunken mistakes, then you’re not drunk enough!

AK: You should go home.

Last night

A photo posted by BETCHES (@betches) on

Favorite meme right now?

AK: Have you checked out the Betches Instagram?

JA: I do like all the Kanye rant memes. They’re really funny.

AK: And they’re not meant to be funny.

JA: Because he’s not trying to be funny. Anyone that’s being really ridiculous, any phenomenon that’s really ridiculous…

And he doesn’t even realize how ridiculous he’s being.

JA: Exactly. I think the Internet’s so funny because it changes every 2 days, so tomorrow, there will be a new thing to make fun of. The really funny stuff is making fun of… You know, like those stick figure things. [Bob does this. Be like Bob.] The memes that are making fun of THOSE memes.

Guilty pleasure social media accounts you’re following right now?

AK: Betches!

JA: I think anytime you’re looking at a Kardashian’s Instagram, it’s a guilty pleasure. You don’t wanna know, but you just wanna know.

AK: And you’re just like, Why am I adding to your 20,000 million followers [right now]...

Right, and they’re making so much money off of each picture.

JA: You wanna know, but you wish you didn’t wanna know.

AK: Kylie Jenner!


Worst first date?

Both: It’s always the second dates that are the worst!

AK: When you’re like, “Oh, I don’t really like you. At all. What is happening?”

Moment you’re looking forward to the most in 2016?

JA: Our book launch!

AK: April 19th. Yeah, we just wrote a book. Well, not just…

JA: [laughing]

That’s so exciting!

AK: [It’s a dating book that says] Don’t take yourself too seriously dating.

JA: It’s a fun dating book. It’s not like, a sad dating book.

I Had a Nice Time and Other Lies: How to Find Love & Shit Like That, the highly awaited second release from the girls behind Nice is Just a Place in France, will be available April 19th. Pre-order it here.

Inappropriate thing that always makes you laugh?

AK: Everything.

JA: Everything we post – it’s why we do what we do. That’s why it’s funny [because it’s inappropriate]. It’s something you shouldn’t be saying. Anything that pushes the envelope is something we’re very into.

Lol jk sort of

A photo posted by BETCHES (@betches) on

Cocktail of choice?

JA: Vodka soda. It’s kinda basic, but whatever.

It works!

AK: Tequila. Just straight shots.

*Shots Emoji*

JA: All these things have evolved since we first started writing…

AK: Back then, it would have been just straight shots.

JA: It’s funny because we’ve been doing this – our business – for five years now. So it’s funny that, our answers, I think if you would’ve asked us these 5 years ago, they would be completely different.

Of course! I mean, you were both in college back then.

Fashion trend you will never, ever try? Or secretly hate?

AK: CULOTTES. [double checks to make sure I’m not wearing them]

I think because we’re shorter girls, it’s hard to pull it off. I love the wide-leg velvet pant trend, but it just does not work if you’re 5’4” or shorter. Unless you’re wearing stiletto heels.

AK: They’re just not flattering. Why would you want your legs to look like trees? I just don’t get it.

JA: I’ve never tried them, but…

Well, they would look good on you, you’re tall! I bet you could rock them.

JA: I’ll check ’em out.

[to AK] Now she’s gonna like, mess with you. “WHY DO YOUR LEGS LOOK LIKE TREES?!”

Anything else you guys want to share with me?

JA: We have an emoji keyboard coming out. [to AK]  Show her some! We’re really excited. They’re gonna be really cool.

AK: [showing me some of their endlessly entertaining new emojis, which include the middle finger, Soul Cycle spin bikes and more] There’s some really cute ones, and then there’s like... “You can’t spin with us. Are you my Uber? Shots shots shots!”

Betches will DEFINITELY love this.

AK: #ShopBetches. Just hashtag Shop Betches!

JA: We just came out with a line of greeting cards! Pop-culture inspired; we have a Justin Bieber one…

AK: [And] DJ Khaled. Anything that’s Instagram trending… KEY TO SUCCESS.

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